Thursday, January 27, 2005

I have decided....

Is there a time limit to getting over pain?
Is there a period of grief ?
Is it 41 days like when someone dies?
Or is it indefinite?
Could it really be up to me?

Okay..it is time for me to emerge from my cocoon of self pity. It is starting to sicken me. So what my heart is broken? So what I am in pain? Worse things could happen. I could be terminally ill, or dead. So since I have life I have hope right? I mean it isn’t the first time this has happened, but hopefully it’s the last. Anger and bitterness will only delay healing, I realize that.

It is amazing how people use your weakness to pull you further down…does that make them feel better? “Let me sneak one in why she’s down that way I’ll be the stronger person” is that their thinking? News flash, my weakness is temporary! This too shall pass! I was told that I unconsciously enjoy wallowing in pain, I’m not sure how true that is, but I am ready to be over it today.

First thing’s first, I will start going to church again and bible study, God has always been there for me and it seems ungrateful of me to stop fellowship with him every time I don’t get what I want.

Then I would count my blessing…one by one, remembering my friends that are there for me in their own way every time.

Posted by Queenb :: 12:16 PM :: 0 comments

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