Monday, February 14, 2005

Friends or Foes?

Where certain issues are concerned, my wrath has no bias.
Recently a very good friend of mine put me in a very awkward situation and it really got me thinking…what do people derive when they spread bad news? I don’t mean gossip like Heavy D is dead or Jen and Brad have split O! Na not that kind, but the kind like ‘I saw your ex-boyfriend (who you are not over, BTW) with this really cute girl’ or ‘your man was dancing kinda close with this girl at the club the other night’ sorta shit. I supposed where loyal friendships are concerned you may have to break the news to your girl every now and then, but only if its critical. If what you about to say will have no benefit whatsoever and you know for a fact that the only derivative from your news is pain then please keep that shit to yourself!
There are some folks whose guilty pleasure is watching you hurt and they get their orgasms from giving you gist that will not benefit you in anyway but rather hurt you and then they serve as the shoulder you cry on! I despise such people and I go the extra mile to ensure I don’t fall into that category but this good friend of mine put me in that situation. I have forgiven her and I don’t love her any less but I did not appreciate it at all. We all posses the power to affect people everyday and never really know how much impact our words have on their lives. I see things all the time and I notice situations that just aint right but I weigh the good and the ugly and let certain things slide especially if it’ll only bring pain.
If your joy comes from bringing others pain, then you need to check yourself. I think the whole thing may be unconscious because it baffles me how it could feel right. Excusing such actions by calling it friendship is what bothers me! I believe in the elasticity of a friendship and I believe it has to bend to endure but my joy comes from seeing my friends feel good about themselves, reminding them of how great they are, supporting them in whatever they decide without compromising myself, offering my harsh criticisms with love and tenderness but mostly avoiding adding to their pain.

Posted by Queenb :: 2:38 PM :: 4 comments

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